So, Patrick, how was your long weekend?

I took this past Monday as a vacation day. Upon returning, I sent this email to the team, and they suggested I post it here.

Upon returning from my vacation day, some of you may ask how my long weekend went.

Here is the answer I had hoped to give you:

On Saturday, the kids visit their grandmother all day. My wife and I catch up on a few chores, and then I get out the power tools and hang epic amounts of Christmas garland around the living room ceiling, while my wife puts out the other decorations. We assemble the tree. Then we pick up the kids around 6pm and head to Black Creek pioneer village for their annual Christmas event. We eat roasted chestnuts while making 19th-century ornaments and listening to choirs sing carols.

On Sunday we decorate the tree, cut out paper snowflakes to decorate the walls, and watch a classic Christmas movie or two. On Monday, I spend the day shopping for a few last people on my list. I greet a stranger. I pet a dog. Later, I order a few things online with plenty of time for them to arrive before Christmas.

Here, however, is how my weekend actually went:

Saturday: in bed all day with the flu. The medicine, it does nothing. Emerged briefly to drive the wife and kids to Black Creek pioneer village and back.

Sunday: in bed all day with the flu.

Monday: Debated the feasibility of my epic garland-hanging plan with my wife. Decided that what my plan needs is a new ladder. Bought a ladder. Realized the ladder was kind of crappy. Returned the ladder to the store and bought a better one. Got home and realized I forgot to buy drywall anchors. Could not face making a third trip to the hardware store. Moved epic amounts of garland back to the corner of my basement to try again next year. Spent the evening hanging out with my family, learning that the true meaning of Christmas is not garlands, or gifts, or pioneer villages, or paper snowflakes; rather, Christmas is all about peace on Earth or something.

Photo above: approximately two feet of the Christmas garland I hung last year. Not shown: the remaining 36 feet I had planned to install this year.